Dear Groom,
So… I get it. If you’re like most grooms, you aren’t really thrilled with the fact that you’re going to be being photographed all day long. I want you to know I completely understand, and I’m going to do my best to get my portion of my commitment done in a timely manner so that you can go and do the things you want to be doing on your wedding day, because that is what matters most. If you’re stoked about getting pictures done, then I am SO excited to work with you! But just in case you’re not… read below.
The thing is…. Your fiancé is going to love this. Love it. She could have a million photographs of the two of you together, and it would possibly not be enough. It’s because she loves you, and as a woman, she’s likely looked forward to this one day- this once in a lifetime day- for her entire life. My job is to give this to her- to make sure she has as many options as possible- to make sure that she gets what she’s always dreamed about. I also need to make sure that I’m delivering the product that my portfolio says I can, and our contract says I will- which might mean that I have to take you guys out of the cocktail hour to do photos at sunset, or perhaps pull you out of the reception for a few minutes to do a night-time shot. I know the most important part about your wedding is the time you spend with your friends and family (and new wife), and I will always be respectful of that. I would want to hang out with my friends and guests as much as possible too. My job is about balancing the need for unobtrusive documentary photography while you freely enjoy your day, while also nailing the shots that are expected and necessary on a wedding day. To do this, I need your help and cooperation.
Here is the straight up deal. 80% of the day is straight photojournalism, where you wont even realize I’m there. However, sometimes, I’m going to have to pose you, although most of the stuff I’ll be shooting will be more natural. Most of the time I’ll be pretty far away using a telephoto lens, so I wont be right up in your faces…but not always. You’re probably going to be sweaty, and super hot in your suit outside, and that’s not comfortable. I’ll bring extra water and you’ll have a shirt to change into later. While you might be uncomfortable in the heat, you’re also going to get to have some quality time with your wife on your wedding day. You’re going to be able to snuggle in, to kiss her, to wrap your arms around her, to tell her that she looks incredible (because she will). Even if you aren’t the type that loves being photographed, I want you to remember why you are marrying her. I’m asking you to give her this gift- this gift of patience. I am asking you to give her a photo session that is fun and loving for her wedding, to be excited about kissing her, loving her, spinning her around and snuggling in. Because if you do that, those photos will remind her every day how amazing she felt on her wedding day, and how much she loves you. The thing is, photos capture more than just images- they capture memory of the emotions you were experiencing. Years down the road she can look back on these photos and still remember how she felt – for better or for worse.
Also… you should know I love photographing the guy stuff: The brotherhood, the friendship, the style. For me, the groom doesn’t take a backseat- it’s just as important as the bride. I want to make sure you’re getting what you want too- and making you look amazing. I want to capture timeless, handsome, dapper, and most importantly- authentic- photos. I want to make your kids look back on your wedding photos and think ‘that was my DAD?!”. I want to photograph you and your best guy-friends together, having fun, being who you are. Lots of this will be photojournalistic- the majority actually. Sometimes I’ll guide you into poses that make you look good, but mostly it will be pretty casual.
I know that not all guys dread taking photos. But most do, which is why I write this letter. I also want you to know that I get it- I’m on your side- and it’s actually kind of a fun experience if you let it be. You just have to relax (and I’ll help you), and have fun, and know that you are giving a killer amazing gift to your wife- the best way to start out a marriage.
I’ll see you soon,
Lexia Frank (wife to a man who doesn’t really love getting his photo taken, and two fiery little boys who feel the same way, but they do it for me and I love them for it)
